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Donna Ramirez's avatar

This passage does speak to me on a very deep level. My grown children have taught me to open my heart and mind and even my spirituality to those outside my social circles of origin.In fact I have had to reorient myself into where I felt I belonged many times on this life journey. I have a very mixed and beautiful family. I married a South Texas Hispanic man about 50 yrs. Ago. I grew up in Dallas in a bible belt southern baptist home. My husband grew up in a poor immigrant family. He and his older sister were first generation US citizens. He picked cotton along with other family members as a child. They were deeply Catholic. Both families were concerned about our union. We met when he was in Med school and I a young nurse. We had 3 children. They have extended the borders of our family in many areas. My oldest son married a Hindu woman whose parents also migrated here to go to med. school. They are among the kindest people I have ever met. My daughter is the "bread winner" of her family and her husband has mostly stayed home to raise their daughters. The flip-side of the traditional marriage. My youngest SON, 40, is gay and has a partner that is a shining light to us all. One of my teenage granddaughters is lesbian. She is dearly loved and supported by us all. All 3 of my granddaughters are kind, bright and full of positive life energy. I guess I am saying that I have a very mixed race, mixed sexuality, mixed religions, mixed many things family. A microcosm of what this country is. And I could brag on each of them until I was breathless and wore you out. But, my heart has been hurting for a long time. My great-grandfather was rumored to be a member of the KKK although he had a sweet, gentle character and was a country preacher in NE Texas. Dallas was a Jim Crow hot bed when I growing up in the 50s and 60s. Even as a child none of this sat right in my soul. As an adult I have overheard conversations from other white mama PTA peers that my children were unfairly going to take the places in universities that rightfully belonged to their kids. I have lived my life trying to enlighten people as I too was being enlightened. But the current state of affairs in this country is giving me pause and I have to daily fight to remain hopeful. I am going to pick up the Bregdan Chronicles again. My mother and I were reading it together and had many rich discussions while I was assisting her in her final years. She died in 2020. She was ready to meet her Jesus with a smile on her face. But, those times we had our discussions have given me some of the sweetest and richest memories of that season of her life. My exposure to the many challenges and dangers that nonwhite, poor, LGTBQ, and all women have faced has been near and far, impersonal and personal. I have really been living my second half of life trying to represent a kinder, more just, open minded person. i heard the expression about a white lady being called "a Karen" not too long ago. I have had some very lovely friends maned Karen. But this Characterization is one I am trying to be the "anti- Karen". Thank you for your writings and sharing your whole heart soul and mind. You help remind us that we are not on this life journey alone. We can face the good, the bad and the ugly together. We can use this to do better, be better, love better.

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Donna Ramirez's avatar

Thank you for this inspiring post. I know how you feel about humanity through your chronicles and by your thorough research to provide the truth about the good, the bad and the ugly. I, like you, have a measure of privilege to make the choice day by day to remain in an orbit that can reflect the light. You also have a deep empathic nature. I am a 72 yo white woman. I carry a very guilty conscious in my awareness that it has been my own people who have contributed to horrific misery and barely survivable living conditions for those fellow humans who look, speak, dress, etc. differently than ourselves. It is that empathic awareness that acts as my gravitational pull out of my orbit. I am acutely aware that my life will remain relatively unchanged for the duration of my because of my privileged landing upon this earth. But, my heart is hurting for those who happened to land in a different place. Not because of who they are, but because of who I have been in thinking I am superior. And, not Superior alone but in the collective beliefs and behaviors of those who look like me. I believe there is a disordering that will continue until we have unraveled and broken long held systems to the point they can be obliterated or reordered into something much more wholesome, and life affirming to all humankind. I believe you, Ginny, have been a light that has shined a necessarily upon the evils of mankind's actions toward our fellow bothers and sisters. But I also think that has come from a place of compassion and courage. A knowing that bringing to life wonderful characters that carry the lessons through your story telling can open eyes and hearts of women like myself. I knew some of the facts. But it is so much more compelling and life changing in applying the stories of our collective history into relatable stories. You have been and still are a light that shines truth, hope and love onto others. I am sure your light came through your own openness to feel the pain of others, share your pain and then believe in the goodness that still lies within each of us to do better.

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